When you were young, your parents told you to do a million things, right? I know my parents did. And I was the youngest, so my older sister chimed in a lot too.

I was used to all the “do this” and “do that” going on, but the joke was on me one summer when my parents bought me a T-shirt in Ocean City, MD when I was about 8 or 10. It said, “I never get lost because my parents always tell me where to go.” And I wore it for YEARS, all during which they laughed hysterically because they knew I didn’t know what it meant. (I look back on that and think… that is SO not fair!)

Anyway, when you’re a child it feels like you’re being directed all the time and while most of the directives are for the benefit of safety, they’re also for the benefit of learning and growing. And hopefully, as we grow up we become more “advised” by our parents and less “bossed around.” At least, that’s how I remember my teen years through my college years and beyond.

The advice I heard might have seemed like a broken record at the time, but it also had weight and meaning I had yet to discover. I look back and think, “Hmmm, my parents really did know what they were talking about!” (Imagine that!?)

These days, there are quite a few things both my sister and I recall hearing from our parents that are applicable to life and work today. The bits of advice we heard and the lessons we learned were little recipes for happiness and success, some of which had been passed down through the ages. It reminds me of the line: “What you learned in kindergarten is all you need to know.”

Maybe you heard this one as a child: “Eat your veggies or no dessert.” This one was common. “You won’t get dessert if you don’t finish your vegetables” or “No dessert if you don’t finish your dinner.” At other times I heard, “You can’t go out and play until you finish your chores” or “You can’t watch TV until you’ve finished your homework.”

If you heard these lines too – or some variation – what you likely took away was the message “dessert last,” which meant you needed to do what you had to do in order to do what you really wanted to do.

It’s a good message that reminds us that whatever we really want out of life, we must work for – or put some level of effort forth – first. The key to progress and reaching any goal you’ve set for yourself (or your job, career or business) is to be highly focused on what you need to do first before spending time on the things you really want to do.

If you spend much of your time doing only the things you’d rather do, instead of what you need to do to make progress, then you’ll have wasted one of the only real assets you have these days: time. And most of use can’t afford to waste any time. A lot of that lost time can commonly be lost to things like procrastination, perfectionism and avoidance without really investigating the reasons behind these behaviors.

And then, if that weren’t enough, finding the balance between doing what you have to do and doing what you want to do is where the struggle lies. But finding that balance is also where real happiness begins. It doesn’t have to be 50/50. It can be another ratio that works for you. But that’s the key: it has to work for you.

And you’ll know if the balance isn’t there… if it’s not working. If you’re working too much, you’ll feel out of energy, stressed, frustrated or overwhelmed. If you’re playing too much, when you really need to be working, your job, career or business may be suffering in some way.

To find more of the happiness and success you want, be clear on 3 things:

• You’re balance today. See if you’re out of balance one way or the other.
• Your goals for yourself, your job, your career and/or your business. Do you have too many or too few?
• Your first or next steps to reach each and every goal. Are you trying to achieve too much at once? Or are you suffering from procrastination, avoidance or lack of motivation?

Ultimately, my hope is that you discover your passion and you’re able to turn it into a revenue-generating job, career or business and then “working” each day isn’t a burden. But even if you still hold a day job, I hope it supports a passion you enjoy in the hours when you’re not working.

Either way, focus on first things first – making sure you’re productive and showing good progress – and then enjoy your “dessert,” whatever it may be.

“You do what you have to do, to do what you want to do.” – Patricia Fripp

“Do first things first, and second things not at all.” – Peter Drucker

“Effective leadership is putting first things first.
Effective management is discipline, carrying it out.” – Stephen R. Covey

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One Response to “Make Meaningful Progress Today Using a Lesson from Your Past”

1. Monique says:

   December 5, 2011 at 12:52 am

   Terrific post, Leslie – and fitting for reflection as the end of the year draws near. Sometimes I think that productivity and time management gurus don’t put into words often enough the depth of the yield that we can achieve when we focus effectively. You’ve done just that!